I have so many things to show you. But so little time. I’ll be back for you one day! x
Nice one, thanks.
I’ve been working my arse off in London all summer and am currently in Croatia. Originally came for Outlook Festival but am staying a few extra days and hoping the weather gets better as I refuse to leave without a tan! Then I’ve got 24hrs in Oslo which should be nice. Then back to work and eventually back to Cardiff for uni.
Brief summary of what has been and what is yet to come. Big tings a gwan, or something along those lines x
Gahhh. 19hr shifts 7 days a week are not the one!!!
Being in London for such an extended period of time and working so many hours a day is really getting to me.
Need to keep my chin up and get on with it though! :) x
I have lost numerous weeks and gained a shocking number of pounds due to my family’s know-it-all attitude and lack of respect towards me asking them not to comment on my weight and just let me get on with it.
I’m not trying to place all the blame on them, after all I am the one incessantly shoving food down my throat in an attempt to fill a never ending hole. But I really wish that instead of ignoring my requests they would understand how weak I am and how much of a struggle this is for me.
I couldn’t be any luckier in terms of my friends, all of which initially expressed concern knowing to what extent regaining this weight would affect my general wellbeing. In a sense, I think their continuous support has clouded my thought process around the way in which I deal with my family. Emotional support has never been their area of expertise, but if they could at the very least keep their thoughts to themselves I might actually stick to it for more than a couple of hours and achieve something.
For the nth time this summer, I’ve been really good today… But instead of being proud of myself and feeling motivated, all I can think of is the end of my shift at 2am so I can go to the newsagent and buy a load of chocolate.
I’m fully aware of how much weight I’ve put on: I step on the scales at least ten times each day. I can’t fit into any of my clothes. I am faced with my reflection in the mirror whenever I’m getting changed. Thanks for adding to my self-deprecating thoughts, I really didn’t have enough of my own.
I know you mean well, but please just leave me to it. I’ve said it countless times, how am I supposed to get through to you?
When I eat - “Stop eating, look how fat you are.”
When I don’t - “Why aren’t you eating?”
I’m not sure how much more of this I can take.
I’ve sprained my ankle, was sick about 12 times yesterday and my left dermal has exploded and popped out.
Things aren’t really going my way…
I can’t even remember the last time I was passionate about anything. I briefly wanted to elaborate, just for the sake of trying to clear shit up in my head through words but now that I’m here I don’t even want to do that.
I’m not really sure what the hell is going on.